Archive | April, 2010

Baby steps!

29 Apr

Me, not Emberly. She’s been full out walking for weeks now. Oh yeah, maybe I should have blogged about that.
Anywho, I’m talking about mental health baby steps. I had my yearly “getting to know your doctor intimately” visit at the beginning of this month. I was able to break down in front of her for the second time since meeting her less than 6 months ago. She was willing to up my Zoloft to 100 mg. I felt the 50 mg had been working for the first few months. Lately, however, I just felt immune to it. Sadness and despair had crept back in. I’ve been unable to get excited about thing, except those Emberly related, b/c I was afraid of getting my hopes crushed. My doctor also suggested that I find a therapist to see.
Hi, I work for the local mental health center. Therapists aren’t actually in huge supply for me. I’m sorry, but I’m not going to cry on someone’s couch and then have to work out next month’s schedule with them later in the week. Not happening.
So I actually did the responsible thing and contacted my insurance company. They had a whopping 3 therapists/psychologists they covered in my “area.” read: over and hour drive one way. Gawd, have I mentioned how much I LOVE living in the middle of nowhere? No? Hmm, well, I LURVE it. The price these therapists charged on top of the two+ hours of drive time for a short hour session, persuaded me to stop looking.
Don’t fret, dear reader, for today I have made an appointment! I was able to find a wonderful therapist who actually has an office in BFE that comes highly recommended from a former coworker. What a glorious day it is. I have an appointment scheduled with the therapist (clever nickname to follow) next Friday. From our phone conversation alone, I feel this will be a great adventure. I’m so looking forward to being healthy mentally. I can’t remember the last time I was.
Hang with me peeps, I hope to chronicle my roller coaster ride of divulging personal secretive information to a paid stranger. Wait, it might be more rewarding for me to just hire a male gigolo to listen to my problems. At least then I could get sexually satisfied as well, right? I’ll see how my husband feels about that.

14 MONTHS not years!

7 Apr

I swear, Emberly is the next Jack, only emotionally, not physically.  I’m pretty sure she has hit the hormones of puberty at the ripe ol’ age of one week shy of 14 months. That little lover (we’ll just use that in place of another not so appropriate or endearing term that could be used to describe her to a tee at times) has somehow learned to throw a fit that even a girl slamming her door in her parents’ face would be impressed. I’ve joked before with my previous doctor that Ems may just be bi-polar. Apparently it’s too early to tell and all children go through similar phases. Really? Fantastic. Just to be sure, could we maybe try some liquid Prozac to see if that evens her out? No no, there’s no need to alert CPS. I’m joking, totally. No, seriously, haha. Emberly is never a lover except when she is. I mean, she’s most definitely full oflove especially when out of the blue she decides that she needs to arch her back and do a header out of your arms onto the wood floor. How could anyone NOT think that she’s adorable and lovable. And I never want to love her back when she decides to give me a love tap to the face for not letting her have her way. Who am I to question a person with a medical degree and student loans that will not be paid off without parents like me continually making appointments to make sure that my child is, in fact, “normal.” Oh how I love this easy parenting gig.
And now I’m confused what love I’m actually talking about.
Where’s the prozac?

Guess what!

5 Apr

I’m still here. Shocker, I know. For some reason, I’m never around the computer when I feel like writing. And when I am on the computer, I’m too “busy” looking up new blogs to read. Pitiful, I know. I’m not even going to promise to try harder, so there.

In other news, Emberly is now starting to venture for steps away from furniture on her own. That makes me happy and sad all at once. Everyone keeps asking if she’s walking or talking yet. I usually reply, “Well, she’s working on it, but I’m not rushing her. Soon enough we’ll be wanting her to sit down and shut up, so I’ll take my time wishing for her to get bigger.”

I would like to thank @blogdangerously for making my long week last week a bit more enjoyable. However, my husband may not appreciate all of the shopping I want to do now.